A Wake Up Call : Self-Reliance and Independence

When I was single I usually do things on my own from paying my bills, grocery shopping, doing my laundry and etc. I was away and independent from my parents for 5 years before I settled down. When I am down with fever or get sick I usually treat myself bring myself to the hospital (may sound pathetic but I was able to live with it). For three years that I have my own family I developed an attitude dependence (not totally) because J has always been there and during pre-natal check ups he would accompany me to my OB (which I am grateful for). Since then, I basically rely on him on some things (i.e. buying medicines and paying bills). Don't get me wrong I am not saying it was a bad idea but it got me thinking and somehow made me realize that I am already changing.

During the past months, I had numerous not-feeling-well days and it happens when he is not around (I don't know why). Not that I want these things to happen but it does. There was a time that I felt so pathetic and was sulking into anger of why things like this happen and you expect someone to take care of you but is not around because he is working his butt off to provide you a good life. But then again looking on a brighter perspective, made me think that somehow I need to embark on the idea of self-reliance (again). For the past years being with him he made me feel his importance and that I shouldn't go anywhere else without him especially when I plan to bring the kids along.

Just this morning, I woke up terribly bad and third day of my not-feeling-well-day. So instead of waiting for J to buy me my medicine I brave my way out of the house even if I was feeling feeble walking down the street towards the drugstore (grabe goosebumps ko!) What happend? I survived. I was able to go back to the house without fainting! *sigh*

I am a believer that women in the new century that we can do what men can. It will just take a lot of confidence, courage and perseverance. Somehow, in my journey towards motherhood and parenting, I hope I will be able to do my job well.




I remembered how my mom used to tell me that someday in my life I need to depend on myself and not on my partner. She made a good job by imbibing that attitude in me. In return I would like to do the same to my kids. 


Guide to self-reliance which I got here:


  1. Assume responsibility. Take the blame for things that are your fault; look after your own work; plan your own time; depend on yourself to get things done.
  2. Be informed. If you don’t know some vital piece of information, find it out. Ask. Get the facts you need to make smart decisions. Knowledge gives you power. Ignorance puts you at the mercy of others.
  3. Know where you’re going. Set goals. Have a long-range plan so that you understand the general course you’re trying to make through life. Don’t simply react passively to the world around you.
  4. Make your own decisions. Develop the ability to think for yourself. Don’t rely on others to make choices for you — that’s a sure route to unhappiness. Be decisive.


Do you practice self-reliance? How?



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