Surviving the HELPless

How will I do this?

This was the question in my mind months ago that somehow I managed to provide answers as each day goes by.

Being a stay at home mom is one of the most difficult jobs. Since you will have to juggle between parenting, housekeeping, a good cook, good wife and also budget officer and you try your best not to fail these responsibilities.

Who doesn't want these clean and tidy rooms?
Image from google


Image from google



But first let me share with you some of my nanny mishaps.

Nanny 1: 23 years old. I got her from an agency when I interviewed her, I asked if she was pregnant and negate the fact. So being a trusting me, I didn't ask for pregnancy test because her agent vouched for her. But there were times she was nauseated at home and worsens when we have out of town trips and vomits every after meal but claims to have stomach upset and she eats during the wee hours in the morning. Several months later I was surprised to see her tummy got big like a pregnant woman and she made up stories for me to terminate her contract. In short, I threw away my agency deposit because she didn't reach the 6 month period. Agency offered replacement for the nanny but I opted not to continue the contract anymore.

Nanny 2: 45 years old. Lasted for a week only. She didn't like her job. 

Nanny 3: 18 years old. Lasted for a week also. I terminated her due to smoking (major), a meddler, used my laptop without permission.

Nanny 4: 25 years old: Lasted for 7 months until she eloped with her boyfriend. When she decided to come back, she asked for fare but didn't show up. 

Nanny 5: 18 years old: Lasted for 2 weeks until I terminated her because she pinched my son in front of me and sleeps while she carries my daughter. 

Nanny 6: 25 years old. Lasted for a week also. Left because of her family issues.

Now it's really frustrating to look for a good nanny these days due to the above mentioned. I made a lits of the advantages and disadvantages in getting household help.

Advantages:
  1. Extra hand in doing chores and keeping house tidy and clean. But in my case, it is more of a disadvantage since they don't clean and keep it tidy despite the instructions and trainings. (So more of disadvantage for me).
  2. You can leave your children when you have important events/seminars/trainings to attend to. But in my case, I am not comfortable leaving my kids around with my helper no matter the trust. (Again a disadvantage).
  3. You can send someone an errand just in case you have couch potato days. In my case, no matter how I repeat my instructions they still tend to fail. 
Disadvantages:
  1. Additional cost. These days all around maid demand for higher salary also but not even proportionate to their accomplishments. It's not only the salary that would take part on the monthly budget but also includes their food, electricity and water consumption.
  2. Ruined schedule. No matter how I tell them to inform me in advance when they plan to have their day off/vacation still they win the argument and I am at the losing end.
  3. Unconcerned attitude. Some really don't treat you like family no matter how you treat them well. They don't do their jobs well and I have to repeat instructions over and over again. The attitude of feeling like you have unlimited supply in your house. 
  4. Broken appliances. Most of them doesn't posses a finesse  attitude and often leave me with broken home appliances. I have two broken stand fan with Nanny 1 in a span of two weeks. A broken freezer door in a month time.
  5. Missing things. No matter how I tell them and delegate the task of checking for completeness of my baby's stuff especially during out of town trips, still there are missing toys and clothes. 
  6. Discolored clothes. This I get alot, especially if they are too lazy enough to sort out the laundry.
  7. Meddler. I don't like helpers who act like researchers when they ask questions especially personal ones.
These might be petty things for me but as I have said, I wouldn't want to fail in some of my responsibilities especially with my family. By doing so, it took me days and months to think of ways how to survive a house without extra help. Somehow, we (J and I) enjoy ourselves without even modulating our voices if we talk about sensitive matters. I wouldn't bother also scattering personal/valuable items on each corner of the house.

I would like to share with you some tips that worked for me on housekeeping.
  1. Plan your week/day ahead. 
  2. Distribute the chores on each day to prevent burn outs. 
  3. Practice the habit of finishing a certain task immediately.
  4. Multi-task. I am sure alot of SAHMs are good in this part. 
  5. Involve your toddler in some of the chores. Provide them space in your house where they can scatter their toys and where they can keep them. Make sure to acknowledge their good actions.
  6. Be an example. You can teach your toddler/hubby of how you do things and how you clean the house.
  7. Identify clean/dirty. For you to be able to achieve a clean house, you need an extra pair of eyes to see the areas that needs cleaning already. You can teach your toddler these things.
  8. Delegate. We are not superwomen. We need help also from our partners. Delegate him some tasks at home. (Removing cubwebs, throwing trash, washing dishes) 
  9. Rest. As much as we want to finish everything we have to admit we are not machines. Our body gets burned out also. We need to take at least an hour or so to rest and spend a little "me time".
  10. Reward yourself with a little retail therapy and pampering. 

My baby boy busy sweeping the floor after eating

Hope some of these tips would help. 

 What about you? How do manage your house? Share your thoughts.

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